One of the things that has amazed me since ordination is how much more frequently people approach me and speak of their faith or lack thereof. These are people who often have no idea that I am a deacon, or that I believe. Perhaps some of my brother deacons can shed some light on this.
I recall my initial screening interview with the Diaconate Advisory Committee, and one of the questions put to me was how my secular occupation (clinical social work) would change after ordination. I was stumped for a moment, not having given that much thought, but I recall my response, “I will probably continue to treat my patients in the same way I have always tried to treat them, but there will be something different about me after ordination that I hope will be evident to them.”
I think they approved of that answer, even though it was unrehearsed, and spoken in the moment.
I think I was right in my prediction.
The change is grace, and its effects upon those with whom I come in contact. God has got a hold on me in a new way, and he works through me now in a way different from before, in spite of my shortcomings. Somehow, old obstacles are removed; his grace is at work.
I saw it today in the face of an elderly man who told me he recognized that God had unexpectedly sent me into his life. All I did was bless him and give him the Eucharist. (By the way, this was after my day job. I was serving him as a recognized deacon of his parish.)
I saw it yesterday in the story of a patient who spontaneously talked about her struggle with faith even though she only knew me as her therapist, nothing more.
I saw it in the face of an agitated man unable to speak or open his eyes because of a stroke, and who was probably near-deaf. All I did was give him a tiny bit of the Eucharist, touch his arm, and gave him a blessing. He calmed down. He didn’t seem afraid for a few minutes.
This is God stuff. This is the grace of Holy Orders, Baptism and the Eucharist at work. My job is to get out of the way, and make myself available…… disposed.
